Okay, a secret:

Here in Scooterville - okay - TWO secrets. ONE: Scooterville is actually called Hamilton. The word Hamilton, as far as I know, is an Iroquois term meaning He who rides through burger drive thru on a scooter with case of beer on his lap [citation needed].

Hamilton has many sports teams calling it home. Famously, the Hamilton Tigercats of the Canadian Punting League (since 1950), Forge FC of Canadian Premier League Soccer (otherwise known as football by humanity) and the Toronto Rock of NLL lacrosse who is officially Toronto's team but they're currently playing out of a Hamilton venue for shits and googles.

Other Hamilton hockeyball highlights include the Steelhawks, Generals and Real McCoys of Ontario Sr. hockey, and the Blues, Rangers and Kilty Bees of Junior hockey (Kilty Bees literally referring to bumble bees wearing kilts. I shit you not). Add baseball's Cardinals; Soccer's Hamilton United, Hamilton City SC and Chantilly Forever FC; Rugby's Camels R.F.C. and Hornets R.F.C and Australian footballers' Wildcats.

But wait. Secret number two today is Hamilton's best-kept sports secret: The Hamilton Bengals. If you want to see some of the most talented athletes in the world while they are young, just before turning pro, for 5 to 10 bucks admission, the Bengals are the obvious choice. Every year multiple Bengals players graduate from Hamilton to affiliate Jr. A team Burlington Blaze before getting drafted to the pros. We are a hotbed of lacrosse development in this country. Hamiltonians are missing out on such a treat it's crazy.