I may already be a winner

I try to stay away from coffee-shop coffee but when I do partake, and when they`re doing the roll-up-the-rim-to-win shenanigans I almost always win. Meanwhile my friends who spend a thousand bucks a year at Tim Hortons complain that they never win.

Of course I never claim the prizes - the free donuts or muffins or what-not. I either lose the little paper cup shards or else tip prostitutes with them.

Not this one though! This is terribly exciting. I`ve won a Brookside almond sample! How cool is that? Okay, so it`s not like an entire almond. It`s just a sample, but still - even if I just get to lick the salty almond dust off of it or something...

I can`t wait.

[Editor`s note: We`re pretty sure he`s kidding about the prostitutes.]