Friday, March 20, 2015

Despicable Confession

Things have been so heavy for the last couple months. Cancer victims and then much further suffering by various people who I dearly care for. And me looking back and looking inward and very aware of my own lack of effectiveness in being helpful. Procrastination, missed opportunities and so many external barriers that keep too much love locked up inside me. Too many challenges succumbed to without a fight.

I’m not accustomed to such sustained bouts of heaviness. Have I lost sight of the joyful perspectives I once trekked long and hard to access – so unexpectedly when truth was all I sought?

I can’t remember when I last sought deliberate escape prior to this stark year of 2015; a year I recently promised would be a celebration of life. Recently I have spent a few sessions board-gaming, primarily with Aqualad and his girlfriend, which was effective and fun.

Tuesday night I was feeling a little overwhelmed and turned to an unlikely diversion. I have long disdained the very idea of kiddie/animated movies of the Disney-or-similar persuasion and been pretty vocal about it I think. But I am not one to fear the hypocritical inevitability of being human in an inhumane society and so, finding myself in the home entertainment sector of my vacationing hosts’ little estate (I feel like Magnum P.I. here except there are two Cocker Spaniels, not Dobermans), I popped a Despicable Me disc into the player and uncorked one or more bottles of red.

Well, wouldn’t you know: I actually laughed long and hard. I actually enjoyed it. I feel I shouldn’t have, but I’m forgetting why. Maybe if I do this again I’ll be reminded. But damn, I really laughed. My spirits lightened for a little while.  

1 comment:

IntrepidReader said...

Despicable Me is one of my favourite movies. I am glad to hear it lifted your spirits. It's been a long hard winter, but spring is in the air.