Blinded by the Light

On the drive to work this morning the song Blinded by the Light came on the radio - the Manfred Mann version, not Springsteen. It was a bitter-sweet moment for me.

This song holds a unique place in my psyche.

It's the only song of which I stand at the threshold, peering in, wanting to love the song as I should, with all it's resonance and soaring melodies and vibrant lyrics. But alas, I can not love it though I dearly want to.

Wrapped up like a douche

How in all hell can you love a song with the line wrapped up like a douche in it?

Honestly, what was Springsteen thinking?

Wrapped up like a douche?

a DOUCHE?

It torments me still, as it has for decades.

I once lamented this to a dear friend who is very knowledgeable on the subject of music. Perhaps he would have an answer to my plight.

Not so. He confessed to having the very same problem himself with that song though, surprisingly, not due to the douche word. No. It was the phrase anal curly-whirlies that bothered him.

I looked at him like he had three heads (he has but one of course - a well-proportioned one of which I am jealous).

"Yes. Anal curlie whirlies," he repeated.

Anal curly-whirlies? That's disgusting, I thought. How could I have missed that? Then I thought about it some more.

"No," I said to him. "It's not anal curly-whirlies, you dumbass. It's IN HIS curly whirlie! As in ...little Urly Burly came by IN HIS CURLY WHIRLIE and asked me if I needed a ride..."

So now there is yet another line in the song I cannot bear to hear. Friends are good to turn to in times of trouble but sometimes they can just make things worse. I'm sure his heart was in the right place.

I know I'm not alone in this. I once heard a radio commercial where they tackled this very phenomenon. The announcer said with disdain, as if all of us douche-hearers were tiresome and partly insane, that the lyrics were - something - I don't remember exactly, but the critical word was DEUCE, not DOUCHE.

Of course I don't believe that crap for a moment. It all sounds very conspiratorial and I wonder was that spot funded by a government agency and not really a brewery?

Wrapped up like a DEUCE?

Is that possible? How might a 'deuce' be wrapped up?

If anyone can explain how wrapped up like a 'deuce' makes any sense at all, please please let me know. Or if you have any other perspective on this - Please. My sanity may depend on it. Thank you.

FWG