Tuesday, May 15, 2007

Just when I thought it was safe to go back in the mailbox

Oh, how upsetting.

And here I was gearing up to announce an end to the hostilities.

The evil Reliance people dropped their mailing frequency to once per month and then it had been so long I thought it was all over. Thought they'd surrendered. Alas, not so. But while they're down and barely kicking I shall deliever this blow. I pray this will mark the end of the struggle.

Not at this address! Resident has shrunken to one millionth her former size. Now living on a fibre of Dick Beddoes hat at the Hockey Hall of Fame along with seven dust mites named Spiggles, Xorb, Loof-loof, Dusty, Sneebleshnorpenl%%r, Grumpy and Doc. This letter is too big to be received there. Get your Shit together people! It's too big! Write a smaller letter!

6 comments:

Kathleen said...

They're never going to take her address of their list now, because they're all looking forward to what you're going to write next. You know that, don't you?

Anonymous said...

It's fun eh?

Fantasy Writer Guy said...

Yes. I know. And yes. It's fun.

But I shall continue to feign annoyance because pissed-offness is damn fine entertainment, I say.

That's right. I said 'pissed-offness'. I'm fucking with the English language, people. And no one can stop me.

MUUHAHAHAHAHA...!

Kathleen said...

I would have gone with "pissed-offed-ness" personally.

Babs Gladhand said...

You know through my working long hours and the stress that comes along with it, not once did I think, "Hey, why don't I read Fwig's blog? That'll cheer me up and de-stress me all at once." Why didn't I think that? I have to be some kind of special moron. Anyway, this did the trick.

Thanks, Fwig.

Fantasy Writer Guy said...

I stand corrected. Pissed-offedness is clearly the proper form. Though I'm gonna be cheekey and run with one dash only.

Babs - I'm so glad I could be of help. Oh - and I'm even gladder I didn't post my 'Why people who work for landscape companies are all gonna die' article. That woulda sucked. ;-)