Wednesday, June 27, 2007

Letter to Proctor & Gamble

I'm sending this letter today:

P&G Canada
P.O. Box 355, Station A

Toronto, Ontario M5W 1C5

Dear sir or madam:

I’m concerned about the lid for the deodorant I purchased recently called Gillette Right Guard Sport Active Deodorant with NEW! Fresh Scent!

The lid is designed to fit perfectly flush with the rest of the apparatus forming a simple unified shape. It’s my observation that it has long been the convention in the deodorant world for products of this shape to be designed with such a lid fitting very snugly. Thus when customers reach for the product they need not take caution to pick up the unit by the bottom portion necessarily and need not take care to hold it upright lest the lid fall off. Such casual use of the product would seem encouraged by the manufacturers as the design does not make the body and lid particularly distinguishable.

However the lid of my new Right Guard Sport Active Deodorant with NEW! Fresh Scent! fits very loosely.

This morning I picked up the unit by the lid and the container portion immediately fell away. As I was in the motion of pulling it away from the shelf, the momentum carried the unit roughly three and a half feet west of the cabinet on its path to the floor.

Alas – it did not hit the floor. Do you know what obstacle lies on my bathroom floor roughly three and a half feet west of the cabinet? I think you can guess.

The shot was a perfect one. Swish. No rim.

To your credit, I’m pleased to say that your product floats very nicely and was thus easily retrieved.

However I fear that future enjoyment of your NEW! Fresh Scent! will be hampered by the constant knowledge of the environment this product has visited however briefly – a place not in any way conducive to fresh scents.

It’s my hope that you will share some thought on this matter.

Sincerely,

Fantasy Writer Guy

4 comments:

Dave said...

Just had a similar experience. Check out my haircut post.

Babs Gladhand said...

It's perfect! I mean the letter- not where your deodorant landed.

Kathleen said...

The letter was hilarious. My deodorant's lid/top is on so tightly that my hands are the least bit wet (or damp, it is humid here), I can't get the damn thing off. I'm thinking there should be a happy medium.

Dr. Brainiac said...

Tee hee...*snort*

Yet another reason to use the glide-on stuff. The user understands that the top is designed to come off.

Does this kjcfbkor look infected to you?